previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
What do we, do we say that he's with a necromancer as his new friend?
No, I don't think.
Okay, well what do we say? We need to know who these friends are.
Yeah, well, I don't know that we do.
He's a grown ass man.
It's true.
Okay.
Moot, Glim and Sully, what brings you to our fair city of Derevar?
We are here to help to reunite the kingdoms through the power of communication.
My brothers believe that they can only trade with these three territories.
If I can just fill, fill in a bit of the blanks here.
What you're, what you're saying is, is that they're dumb.
Yes.
Actually, I just have a quick question.
Sure.
What's a nightglam?
A nightgarm.
Yes.
Nightgarm.
That's what I said.
How would you describe it, Terry?
Uh, well, it's a, um, uh, more of a, I don't know if it's a lichen throat,
but it's a, uh, more of a wolf humanoid creature.
Oh, hey, hey little buddy.
Kind of frozen still.
I feel so bad shaking my staff at him now.
I look at Terry to see if it's him.
Wasn't me.
Shaggy, that's why you should name the duck.
This hulking bipedal wolf creature explodes out onto the path before you.
I'm gonna have to remember that one.
Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons.
I'm your dungeon master, Russ More.
He, him.
Also with me today is Carla Maxted.
She, her, playing Glim, a dragonborn pAlydin.
And Tom Laird.
He, him, and I'm playing Moot, who also goes by He, him,
and is a half-orc, wild magic sorcerer.
And Amy More.
That's me.
She, her, and I play Sullivan Sleight, a lightfoot halfling rogue.
He, him.
Thanks for coming tonight, everybody.
I brought you together here to play a game.
What?
This game.
I was told there'd be pizza.
Alright, Jigsaw.
That's right.
You wanna play a game?
Might be a big wolf creature with a hingey jaw.
No, I'm into that.
I just didn't want to have to saw off a leg or whatever happens.
Yeah, no, that's, that's weird.
We don't do that here.
You almost made it look real painful.
We're playing Dumbgeons and Dragons, not facing fate tonight.
Okay?
Oh, great.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaking of which, go listen to Facing Fate.
We are releasing episodes, maybe, when this comes.
No, probably not, actually.
But, you know, we have released a lot of episodes.
It's like three seasons.
Four.
And a mini.
Some mini stuff.
Absolutely.
So, yeah, we'd love for you to go check that out.
Facing Fate, we play over there, too.
That's the tagline for it.
That's the one.
We play over there, too.
If you like what we're doing here or on Facing Fate,
you can pick which one you like the best.
Come join us at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast
where, when you are a patron,
you get an episode dedicated to you like today's patron.
I really thought he'd be more on the ball.
I flipped the page.
He has, like, nine books, which doesn't bode well
for our characters being alive at the end of this encounter.
But I'll let you level up.
Last one, like today's patron, Perry Matey.
Thanks, Perry.
You are awesome.
Agreed.
I really thought Russ was going to say Perry Mason.
Me, too.
It was a bit of a fake out.
Again, another celebrity.
Even a fictional one.
Another fictional celebrity.
I love it when fictional celebrities.
Perry Matey, and I hope I said that right.
Thank you for joining us at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
We hope to see you over there
where we have hangouts and cool stuff like that.
Now, fuck it, let's play.
So we've defeated the monster.
We cut to back with Queen Calacriss
being heralded for our great success.
They're already putting up the stained glass.
Yes, and she's so happy with her new dog.
So happy.
Trees explode out into so close.
So close.
We almost had them, guys.
Look, I did a lot of cut scenes.
We cut a lot of cut a lot of the fat in the last one.
Now we got to have some battles.
Trees explode out into the path before you
and you see this hulking wolf like creature
that stands 10 feet tall.
It's got abs on abs, baby.
Shredded like a ninja turtle.
Its huge claws look like they could pick you up
and crush your skull
and its giant maw opens wide,
letting out a guttural growl
that you smell the stench of death
that washes over you.
Now we've already rolled initiative.
Glim, what do you do?
I'm going to rush forward
and take a swing with my vorpal sword.
All right.
Roll to hit.
15.
Hits.
Great.
15 damage.
What type of damage?
Slashing damage.
Is it magical slashing damage?
Oh, it maybe is.
Doesn't say it just says no.
I don't think it's magical until you find the pair too.
Yes.
Well, we got to find that second sword.
We really do.
But for now, just standard slashing damage.
All right.
You go up and you cut into like the side of this creature
and some blood begins to pour out over the fur
and it turns and it looks at you
with its beady glowing red eyes.
Moot, do something cool.
Hey Moot, like hit him bad
and like really distract him with something.
Okay.
Yeah, I got a little something for that.
I am going to hit it with mind sliver.
All right.
That sounds annoying.
So I drive a spike of psychic energy into the mind
of one creature I can see within range,
which obviously will be the werewolf dude.
He must make a intelligence saving throw
or take some psychic damage
and is penalized on his next saving throw roll it makes.
Well, he rolled a 10 or it rolled a 10.
That will not be enough to succeed in dodging this one.
So it is going to take six psychic damage.
And Russ, if you have to make a saving throw
before the end of your next turn at all,
you need to subtract 1d4 from it.
So with popcorn initiative,
instead of the end of the next turn,
it'll be the end of the next round.
So we'll go through this round
but then also carry into the next round
because we can move around where everybody goes.
And I look towards Sully and I say, now?
And he's already booking it as Moot cast his spell.
Sully dashes behind him
and he's going to attack with both of his daggers from behind
doing a sneak attack.
Yeah, go for it. Awesome.
Okay.
Love it.
Okay, I'm doing it.
Okay, so first I'm going to attack with my daggers.
So the first one is a 19 and the second one is a 15.
Yeah, both hit.
Seven damage for one, 11 damage for the other
and then I get an extra 2d6 damage
because it is a sneak attack.
Damn, Sully can pack some heat now.
And that's another four.
It flinches under this jab into its side
and lets out a howl that echoes through the trees.
Like can Sully back up after he's stabbed?
Is that a thing?
Bonus action, yeah.
Disengage.
No, no, my bonus action I dashed.
Oh, then you can't.
Well, can't I use my action in combat to disengage?
You used your combat actions to attack.
As to attacking.
Okay, well then I'm just stuck in the back of him
with my two.
Okay, hanging on.
Hanging on.
Actually, how tall is he?
I bet I'm just getting, what am I getting?
You're just right in the butt.
I think you're in the thick of the butt.
I want to go size.
Or maybe you were airborne
and now you're attached to its back.
Oh, God, with my face just in the crack of its ass?
Oh, Sully.
It's just that's, that's, yep.
Yep.
You don't need to describe it.
We can all imagine it.
Terry, a little help.
All right, it's Terry's time.
Terry pulls out his weapon and yells,
if you have silver or radiance, use it.
And he's using his leadership command.
Any non-hostile creature.
So basically all of you,
you can add a D4 to your roll.
I'm assuming like saving and or attack roll.
Attack roll or saving throw.
You can roll a D4
and he's going to move in and try to swing in
with his sword, which you might now put together
has some silver to it.
That's a 16 plus 5, 21 to hit.
So he's going to strike in for 10 damage.
But because it's silvered, it gives him 20 damage.
And it cuts deep and like you see the flesh like sizzle
or you hear it sizzle as this blade cuts into it
and it cut way deeper than anything
that you had dealt to it previously.
And it reaches down and bats hard at Terry.
That's a 24 to hit.
Yikes.
So that's going to be 15 damage, slashing damage.
And Terry is grappled in the nightgarm's claw
and he turns and looks at you, glim,
and gives you this like defiant look deep into your eyes
as he squeezes hard into Terry.
Okay, I'm going to attack again with my vorpal sword,
but I am also going to give a quick shout out
to my main man Bahamut so that I can cast Divine Favor
and also get 1d4 radiant damage, you know,
if I successfully attack.
Sure, as you do.
16, 14 slashing plus 2 radiant damage.
And as you take that swing,
you hear more movement in the trees around you.
You don't see anything,
but you hear movement getting closer to your location.
Everybody watch your backs.
Sully, get off of there.
I got it under control, I think.
And Sully is going to...
Can I sneak attack again?
Yeah, you're at its back and it's flanked by two other...
Can you stick a dagger right up its taint?
Right, just reach under.
Well, what I was going to do is...
We call that the Sully special.
Sully is going to start to like mountain climber,
like take one dagger out and put it up
as he's like trying to climb up this.
So I don't know if that counts as attacking
or if that's just the way he's trying to move upward
and just so happens to be hurting him.
Russ, can you put in the mountain climber yodel music
from Price is Right for this?
Yes, yes I can.
I'm sure they won't have a problem with it.
I would still count it as an attack
because basically you're riding a bucking bronco
at this point who's been being cut into from all sides.
So there is a chance that you could miss.
Okay, well that was a one on one.
But you get your halfling luck bonus.
I get my halfling luck.
You are at its back though
and it can't see you so you do have advantage.
Fair enough.
So I say use the halfling luck bonus
and then also compete between the two for advantage after.
Okay, well this one then turned into a 17 plus seven is 24.
And then the next one is a 25.
Both of those will hit handily.
Okay, oh that was a four so it's nine for one.
There's another four, another nine.
So that's 18 and then 2d6 so the 24 poking damage
as I make my way up the back of this wolf being it's slick
and the blood is running down my front
as I clamor my way up sticking it between ribs as I go.
Actually I'm probably only near like hip
sticking it into his love handles.
He doesn't have those got abs on abs
sticking it right into muscle which hurts a lot more.
Loved it.
Love that whole description.
I don't know who to throw it to next.
It'll probably be like that's got to hurt.
I bet it would be the creature's turn.
Okay, two things happen.
Everything goes dark but just before that
you see people begin to come out of the trees.
Six of them and then everything goes dark.
Sully you feel the claw reaching for you.
It's only 14.
Oh doesn't beat.
You feel the claw like reaching back
trying to grab you off of its back but just missing.
You hear Terry in the darkness say
that looked like people that went missing
and he's going to swing with disadvantage
at where he thought the creature was.
Dangerous time to be on a creature's back.
Oh it's a real dangerous time to be on a creature's back.
Terry connects with Sully.
I'm going to roll it because that means
it could be lower than that.
He's seven slashing damage.
Oh my god what and I kick and I kick wildly
and he and I think I was swinging around as it was
so I think he's probably slashes me down my calf.
What the fuck is going on down there?
Roll a d20.
I will.
It's a 10.
You feel your foot connect with Terry's sword
and then you hear it fall to the ground.
Moot I saw you do some magic.
You think you got anything that can take care of this?
What's this?
I don't know what you're talking about.
Darkness you bitch it's darkness.
It's dark it's really dark I can't see anything.
Can you see things?
Is this not affecting you?
That depends where you were standing.
Because you were doing a range.
Yeah I would be a little bit removed from the
the free for all on the fucking werewolf boy.
Yeah just the free for all.
15 foot radius so you actually might be outside of it
so you would see this orb of darkness kind of as it was cast expend out
but you also see all of these people they are people
but they're just kind of slowly walking towards the darkness
and towards the action before you.
Do they look like they have their own free will about them?
Make a an insight check.
Insight plus two so 18.
You get the feeling that they're under a thrall of some sort.
You can't tell exactly what their goal is
but they are walking towards the creature
and towards your friends in the middle of this darkness.
Moot takes out his his floppy sun hat
and also grabs a handful of moss as he's doing this from his spell component belt
and he casts light on the hat.
So the object will shed a bright light in a 20 foot radius
and then a dim light for an additional 20 feet.
And this light will be as bright white as she can go.
Just crank it up.
Just crank it up and he will like hold the sun hat on his head
and walk a little bit closer to where all y'all are.
Like a fucking god out of the darkness comes moot in a sun hat.
That's right.
So you're wearing the hat walking closer not into the mix
until you can see your friends.
Okay yeah absolutely.
I love that.
A roll of 17 so Moot is fine.
Still good okay.
We also have now these these humans in the mix
and they were added in during this rotation
so they would have to go to finish out this round.
So I guess the humans are up next.
All right they see this light emitted
and two of them turn towards you
and the others move towards the main battle.
The ones moving towards the main battle
are reaching towards all of you.
Glim you feel hands on you that are begin trying to pull you.
They're not not like punching or kicking or anything.
They begin trying to pull you and try to pull you to the ground.
Sully you feel them grabbing your legs trying to pull you down
and Terry you see him with two of them
and then two go into moot.
Everybody make a strength check.
Not even not a saving throw
because there's no real damage being dealt here
but just a strength check against them.
My best one.
Remember that we have that leadership bonus if needed.
What is that?
An extra D4.
Oh that's not going to be enough.
21.
I'm going to use that leadership bonus
and with the extra three it's a 17.
Even if I max out my leadership bonus
I'd only get an eight
so I'm gonna just hold on to it.
Glim you easily overpower
describe how you overpower this this human like what you do.
I think sort of that movement you just made
they're pulling at my back
and I just am like throwing throwing the bows backwards
and just like get out of here.
Still focused on my friend on the back of this scary creature.
Moot you managed to knock one off
but the other one like gives you a hard shove
and knocks you prone.
How close exactly were you like
to the point where you could just see them or?
No I went so that it was like
at least visible for all of them.
About 15 feet.
Okay then yeah you can still
there's still light amongst the crowd.
Sully you are pulled off.
I would like to wonder if I may.
If I hold on tightly to my daggers
do they pull through the creature
and give damage as I'm ripped off of him?
Sure I'll give you 2d4 plus one modify.
So that's 10.
And Terry's brought down hard.
You hear his plate mail fall
and see him fall because the light's there now.
Sully I think you would go next.
You're pulled off.
Your blades tear through the back of this creature
who takes some additional damage.
You now have a picture.
He pulled you down by the legs
so you're like on your stomach.
I don't think you landed gracefully.
He is going to grab his frightful sword of reflection
and just try to slash at the dudes who pulled him down.
That wasn't great an 11.
No that's not math 10.
10 hits they are yeah completely unarmored.
Oh poor bastards.
That's seven slashing damage.
Okay.
Oh no piercing.
Seven piercing damage.
Yeah you stab into this person
like they go limp and fall to the ground.
Glimy okay.
Wait no who's who needs to go?
Everybody now we're at the top of a new round.
Oh who needs to go Sully else?
Well I have to pee but you know.
Should have taken my 15.
Terry okay?
Yeah I can handle this so I will
and he kind of reaches back for his blade
which was thrown to the ground
and managed to grab it
and swings into this person
and strikes them hard and sorry
they're a bloody mess
and he stands back up.
I want to light somebody up.
I apparently have one more action
that I haven't been using
so I'm going to do that too.
Terrence.
Sorry it's only a 14.
I'm all flustered I just I'm giving it a haircut.
You light something up.
Now that Sully is not on the back of the creature
I am going to try to burn it with my fire breath
so it needs to make a dex save.
Do bad.
11.
Great thank you.
You're welcome.
Hey I'm here to play for you.
I didn't realize I just had to say do bad
and then you would.
I was going to say we were one round past
where my spell was still affecting it on the ability rolls.
So that is going to be 11 fire damage.
Like the smell of like wet burnt hair now fills this area.
Moot your hat looks great.
What else can you do?
I don't know I'm on the ground.
Is anything else around me or is it just the one person?
There are two near you.
You kind of nudged one back
and didn't they didn't really overpower you
but the other one managed to push you down.
So there are two in your direct vicinity.
Okay so two within five feet.
Was there one like crouching on the ground behind him
that he got pushed over?
Yes that's why that's why it didn't work.
Franksters.
There's a whole Three Stooges bit in the middle.
Whoa.
Oh your own words that is this the last episode
because we finally actually use Jimmy world the middle
and I feel like where do we go from here?
Where do we go from here?
Not to make light of people having strokes
but Russ were you having a stroke?
Solid question.
I was right beside him wondering the same thing.
No I just.
Did he get the droopy face?
Can he lift his arms above his head?
Yeah he's okay.
It's time to act fast Amy.
He's okay.
I'm doing okay.
Okay.
I'm doing okay.
Two on this Tylenol.
Uh thank you.
I don't know if that's what you did first try.
I think that's a heart attack.
Baby aspirin.
Heart attack yeah.
That's a heart attack all right.
I'm sure it couldn't hurt for a stroke either.
Well hopefully Russ's singing didn't give you a heart attack
because you're here in the middle.
We're here in the middle where we want to talk to you
about a lovely show that we think you love
that we think you will love which is bombarded
which includes one of our best friends Kyle Clasett,
Ali Grant, Spurrier, Goodrich, all those good good folks.
Amy's losing it over there.
I guess it's sort of a dichotomy either you've listened to it
and you do love it or you haven't listened to it
and you will love it.
Everyone on earth falls into one of those two categories.
It's a Venn diagram where everyone ends up
in the middle anyways.
It's a music.
It's the middle.
What?
We found our way back.
It's a musical D&D podcast where three bards try
and save the world you know in their own kind of way
but play live music throughout the podcast
and that part is really just super freaking cool.
Well not just live music either like originally created scores
and lyrics by these wonderfully talented people.
They will roll dice to get their chords which is pretty awesome.
Yeah they got special cord dice that they roll up
and then take a brief break from recording
and then come back and sing that song
and then are judged by Kyle on how well they did
which then determines the outcome of whatever the encounter is.
Just such a fun way to play.
It's so fun.
It seems it feels so high risk to me
but that's because I am not a musician
and it's such a good idea.
Go check out Bombarded.
We've got a link down in the description
where you can click through and find it
or you can just search for bombarded just like that.
Emphasis on the bard.
Big old bard right in the middle there
wherever you listen to podcasts do it
and now it's not over yet.
We want to let you know that we have.
This is like the end of Return of the King
where it's like fade to white.
No we're back fade again.
No we also want to let you know about a super special offer
that we got going on on Patreon.
Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast
where you can get two months free subscription.
Yes if you sign up for an annual membership
then you don't pay for two months of it.
It's such a good deal.
Yeah you'll pay for 10 out of 12
which is a pretty great.
One of the great things or well I mean
it encompasses several of the great things
that we do over on Patreon
are the community events like the hangouts
sometimes live streams
the discord chitter chatter that happens
where people feed us TikToks
of super sweet archery.
That's mostly for Carla.
Yes thank you Jess.
All the memes all the questions
that we get over there.
It's really a great place not just for patrons
but for us and we thank you so much for being there
for all of that and you can be a part of it too.
Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast
where we sign up for an annual membership
you can get two months free
right up until the end of October.
So go do so.
We would love you for it.
I mean we love you anyways.
We love you anyways.
Our love is not contingent.
No just wanted to let you know
about the special sale going on.
Because there's cool stuff over there
and we would love it if you love that too.
Okay love you bye.
But wait there's more.
Oh I'm getting I'm getting it.
Now it's over.
Okay bye.
Okay bye bye.
I'm gonna like cross my arms in front of me
and then like kind of shoot them back out
and I will cast sword burst
and I create a momentary circle
of spectral blades that sweep around me
and all creatures within five feet
must roll a deck saving throw
or take some damage.
Love it when the spell caster
gets some new spells that we get to hear about.
It's so fun.
We got a six and a five.
I mean neither one of those are great Russ.
Yep I figured.
Really aiming it up.
My do bad held over it goes.
It's a whole round till the end of the round.
It's like leadership.
Now's the time to get it people.
They each take well I guess
should I roll damage separately for them
or just the same one for both?
Same one for both.
Okay well they each take five force damage.
They both fall to the ground
as this is blasted and like I picture it
like blast them back
and they like hit the tree stump
and appear unconscious.
And kind of throw a thumbs up towards Glim
and I guess it's the big bad monster's turn.
It's going to try to bite Glim.
That's a 23.
He does bite with his big scary teeth.
He's got some chompers.
Yep I hope it doesn't make that gulping noise
as he swallows you whole.
You have to fight your way from the inside out.
25 piercing damage.
Oh my god.
Jesus.
And you have to make a strength saving throw.
Yikes.
Or be eaten alive.
Or be swallowed whole.
Oh my gosh.
Do it Glim.
That's pretty wild because I am big
so he is so big.
Oh my god I don't have that
it doesn't matter even if I did have it
because it still is only six.
Everybody else sees this creature.
Glim you are so much stronger than that come on.
Take a step back.
Can I help?
No she's gone.
Take a step back unhinge its jaw
like unspeakably and impossibly wide
and clamp down around Glim
and lift her up and like in one gulp she's gone.
Well podcast over.
Russ just keeps killing off Carla's characters.
Right.
You're not dead yet.
Also it's wild.
The thing's like 10 feet tall.
I think I'm like seven feet tall.
I said 12.
It's wild.
Right.
Sorry.
I said 12.
Still it's crazy.
It's true the mechanics of this are quite.
It's really something.
Fantasy mechanics.
I've imagined this creature so much taller
in my description but I guess Sully is much smaller.
For you yes that's it.
So like he really is like mountain climbing up this thing.
For you it's just like what up.
That said yeah you're probably your feet are sticking out
of its mouth but yeah it's like swallowed the majority of you.
The other two humans are gonna just kind of stand and watch.
They're not gonna do anything.
Perverts.
I hope my scales cause a lot of indigestion.
You hear off into the into the trees
like a thunderous cacophony of like busting down of trees
something big is coming fast.
Glim it's your turn.
Well I don't hear that.
I just hear like wet gushing noises.
So as you are swallowed a swallowed creature
is blinded and restrained has total cover against attacks
and other effects outside the nightgarm.
It takes acid damage at the start of each of the nightgarm's turns
at the start of each of the nightgarm's turns.
So not your turn.
Yeah but if she's blinded and restrained.
You just roll with.
Well I mean.
What can she do?
Well stab wildly.
Don't open your mouth but you're restrained.
Can you stab if you're restrained?
Well you had your weapon in your hand right?
Yeah I did have my weapon in my hand.
Wish I hadn't used that fire.
It'd be pretty dope right now but.
Dope inside.
Too bad.
You got spells and stuff too.
Well I kind of do.
Can you radiate from the inside?
Should I try to speak with animals from inside?
I don't know if you want to open your mouth.
I don't.
I don't want to open my mouth.
But I can.
Let's see how this plays out.
Alright.
I'm going to channel divinity.
Nature's wrath.
So I'm going to cause spectral vines to spring up and reach for a creature.
They have to succeed on a strength or dex saving throw.
But these are inside it.
So how does that work Russ?
Okay.
Oh I'm on board.
So normally it would try to break free of them with that strength or dex save.
I don't think it can because it's coming from inside of it so.
The call is coming from inside the house.
I was just going to say that.
Get out of my head Tom.
I won't.
I love it in there.
How I picture this and you can feel free to correct me if you don't like it.
But these vines like you can feel them glim begin to emerge from like inside this
stomach that you find yourself in and shoot out of the creature.
Everybody else you see these vines like thorny blood covered vines shoot out of
the stomach of this creature who lets out an enormous roar and like painful.
Can it though?
It's got a mouth full of glim.
It's got a stomach full of glim.
Uh oh.
Yeah stop.
As like it's it's it's abs on abs are shredded apart and then these vines like wrap around
and begin to compress where glim is not.
So give me is there damage for that or.
There's not damage.
Normally it would just be um restrained but I guess.
Let's just roll 2d10 and see what happens.
I mean if you're getting all vined from the inside.
Like that seems like bad news.
It's really bad uh 14.
It's gonna make a con save.
It didn't beat the hit point threshold that it has in the monster book but I feel like
fine shooting out of a stomach is an exception to that rule and it failed its con save.
So you are projected out back out of this creature uh 10 or 15 feet away and land
hard on the ground your blade down on the ground beside you as you see what you have
created as this creature is being like constricted from the inside out basically.
Ew I wonder if that's like how a caterpillar makes a cocoon.
Who you who you want to go next?
I think Terry because he yeah.
Terry turns to you and says I don't know if I can recreate that noise but I will try.
Um and he's gonna swing not well one one of his great sword hits.
But like this thing is still being like constrained?
He gets he gets one hit kind of on this second hit that actually connects he turns
and you hear this thunderous glim you now hear it for the first time but this thunderous
stampede through the trees and before you is this like furry
20 foot tall what looks like 4,000 pound creature that emerges from the forest beside you.
Busts through and into the midst of this and picks up the nightgarm
and where it's already being torn apart shreds it into and throws the pieces at
the remaining two humans and it turns and begins to look at all of you
with this let's say Sully go next make a perception roll.
That is a five.
Everybody else make a perception roll.
12.
16.
The three of you look at this creature and although the creature is huge and hulking
and terrifying like it has long claws and fangs out of this muzzle that comes out of this
long wiry matted hair the eyes look familiar though.
Aw Scruffy.
Almost saucer like.
Holy shit what the fuck is this?
And I take my sort of reflection frightful reflection and start to advance on the beast.
Wait.
What?
Wait.
Why?
Do you do any of you see?
It's I think it's Scruffy or Scrappy or Scraps or.
It's the dog from the.
Marky bark.
This is it.
Look at the eyes.
And we have a moment where his eyes look into my eyes.
Roll.
My eyes look into his eyes.
Animal hand.
One.
Oh god.
No can't be it.
Because of your bonus.
It was a two but I had a minus one so I don't think that counts.
I don't think it does either.
I don't see it.
No I think it is.
Does 17 hit.
Me?
Yeah.
You're going to take 18 bludgeoning.
But the why the fuck.
Because you looked at it funny.
Too much eye contact.
Sully is struck hard by this creature and thrown against a tree.
Glim do you have any more of that food.
Scruffy come on barky bark.
Thomas I don't know what you want your name to be but here.
And I find some more of my my beef jerky or.
It hears the crinkle of the wrapper.
And turns and looks at you.
Roll animal handling.
And with advantage.
I didn't get a snack upstairs because I knew the minute I busted into those gummies.
Only 11.
It turns quickly and looks at you and there's this panic in its eyes.
And then it softens.
And then you see it slowly begin to move towards you and as you hold out.
The food towards it.
It takes it in one of its giant claws.
And turns and begins to eat it like it's a it's a small piece of food compared to
this creature but just like start shoving it in its mouth.
And you see it begin to shrink.
In size you hear bones and flesh popping as it.
As it moves down back to the small dog you found in the brush.
It turns and comes over to you.
Hey buddy thanks for eating that gross thing that was trying to eat me.
I'm gonna go over and help Sully up.
Yeah and what's happening with the people.
This dog hulking creature through the two pieces at the two remaining people.
Everybody that you can see looks dead but they don't.
Appear normal in death.
Like their blood runs more black than red.
As they die you see where any wounds open up like quicker decay.
Sully are you okay?
Yeah no I'm fine I had worse.
We tried to tell you it was it was the dog.
What?
See it's the dog.
Well it didn't look like the dog it looked like the not.
Listen I can't do this right now.
I'm tired.
Okay well you just you know maybe here you sit up and don't fall asleep.
That's going to be very important right now.
And I'll just I'll just hang here with you and I'll keep you company keep you awake.
Okay.
The scene fades out on everybody and the gore around them and we cut back to the castle
where the three of you and the dog and Terry are not in that hallway but in another section
of the building watching as the artist is putting in a a panel of stained glass
of the four of you taking down this nightgarm.
They do quick work here.
Yeah no they move they move fast.
You made it onto the wall Terry?
I did I did make it onto the wall.
I mean thankfully not up in the rafters yet that was a close one for some of us.
Yes oh my goodness.
What kind of sounds did you hear from the inside?
It just it was like um you ever swim underwater so that sort of deafness in
your ears you know right but then a lot of just like
like real scooching kind of sounds and just it was so wet and smelly and it really I
don't recommend it.
This is going to be a very
4D experience I'm going to have to give at this next puppet show.
Dumbgeons and Dragons season two episode 95 is starring Amy More as Sully,
Carla Max dead as Glim, Tom Laird as Moot and Russ More as your dungeon master.
Editing production and sound design is by Russ More.
This episode featured music from Kavin MacLeod and Epidemic Sound
and sound effects from Epidemic Sound, Boom Library and Sound Ideas.
A huge thank you to our supporting producers.
Gabriel Lynch, Jessica Babyok, Kat Waterflame, Stevie, Jacob Madden,
Devin Michaels, Christian Brown, Aaron Stevens, Lulahan and Charlie Warley.
Support Dumbgeons and Dragons and our many other productions and get access
to an exclusive podcast and bonus episodes all while helping us unlock the special
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at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
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and on Instagram and Twitter at dumb dragon cast.
Thank you for listening.
Have a great week.
We'll talk again soon.
Well, I'm a level four character, so that's all I can do.
That's all I got.
Who goes next?
Oh, I'm sorry.
That's okay.
I rolled the wrong dice.
Good thing I rolled really shittily last time, you guys.
So sorry.
My daggers are 1d4s.
Yeah.
What'd you roll?
I rolled a 1d6, but I definitely got below four for both.
Yeah, you did.
Oh, you got an 11 on one.
Oh, that means I got one more.
You can subtract one from here for really doing it.
Dumbgeons and Dragons is a dumb dragons production.